From William Carlos Williams Is a Really Bad Roommate by Mollie Wells for Yankee Pot Roast ("The Journal of Literary Satire, Hastilly Written & Slopilly Edited")

This Is Just to Say

I have eaten
the soy ice cream
that was in
the ice box

and which
you expressly asked
me
not to touch

Forgive me
it was so gross
I threw half of
it away


This Is Just to Say

I have clogged
the sink
that is in
the kitchen

and which
you requested
I not use
to rinse my silkscreens

Forgive me
my band needed merch
and Bill’s wife
wouldn’t let us do it there


This Is Just to Say

I have restarted
the PlayStation
that was in
your room

and which
you left on
because you
hadn’t found a save point

Forgive me
I skipped my job interview
and wanted
to play FIFA


This Is Just to Say

I have given away
the key
that was under
the planter

and which
you said
my girlfriend
couldn’t have

Forgive me
her sister kicked her out
but she’s quiet
I swear